I want to live in the forest. Ever since I was a teenager, my dream has been to live in a super secluded spot where it’s just me and nature. I would love to just ride my bike through the lush forests and enjoy being at peace with the world. Living in an apartment near Melbourne is about as far away from that dream as you can get. Don’t get me wrong, I do like city life, especially as a uni student, but am I living my ideal way? No, not at all. My parents think I should be saving up to buy a house nearby, but all I want is to buy a cabin in the woods. I don’t care if they have access to the best conveyancing firm Highett has to offer—I want to live as far away from here as possible.

When I imagine where I want to be in ten years, it isn’t working at some Melbourne real estate business. It isn’t in conveyancing, helping with the legal side of buying a house. It isn’t working in law. I don’t want to follow in the footsteps of my parents. I imagine myself out on a sunny day, rowing down the nearest river with the sun beaming on my face as I read the latest epic novels that have been released. I wonder if I can find someone who owns a conveyancing firm to help me with the conveyancing and settlement of a cottage in the woods. I’m all for it. Somehow, though, I doubt that will be the case. Perhaps I am doomed to live a lie, cursed to be stuck in the city forever. I hope that isn’t the case, but honestly, the chances of me finding a cabin in the woods that I can live in are pretty low. I’m starting to think that the best thing for me to do may be to get a high-paying job, save up and then go off the grid. We’ll see what happens, I guess.

 

Today is my first day lecturing at the University of Conveyancing, and I’m really nervous. I’ll be teaching the History of Conveyancing class. I’ve prepared a script for the first few minutes, and I’d love to know what you all think. Please tell me that it’s good. Alright, here we go.

Listen up you no-good, worthless snail-lickers, my name is Thompson Ryan, and I’ll be your lecturer this semester. Today, we’re going to be learning about the absolute basics of conveyancing. We won’t be talking about what the best conveyancing practices in the Richmond area are. We won’t even be thinking about that, so get it out of your heads. Today I’ll be answering the simple question: what is conveyancing and where did it start? 

Let’s start at the beginning. Conveyancing began way back in the 1300s when a nobleman by the name of Sir Thomas Cooper decided that he wanted to buy the property of a local peasant. In order to assure that the process was done legally, he told his court accountant to learn all about property purchasing laws. Thus, the first-ever conveyancer was created. I don’t care how fake that sounds, that is the exact and true story of how conveyancing was invented, according to this university’s curriculum. If you want to pass my class, you’d best put that to memory.

I’m sure you’re wondering all about my personal connection with conveyancing. Well, listen up, you chocolate-coated tissue-eaters. I worked for years in the industry of conveyancing. Prahran was my suburb of choice. Do you want to guess how many houses I have been involved in the sale of? Over five hundred. If you ever want to get close to those numbers, you’d better pay attention, because History of Conveyancing is the most important class you will ever take. Are you ready, kids? Good, let’s get learning, then. 

So, loyal reader, what do you think? Am I going to blow this class away with my awesome lecturing ability? Let me know in the comments!