Category Archives: Plumbing

The Final Sewer



STEVEN UNWIN, larger than life in his stained work gear, greets the camera with a wide, hearty laugh.

G’day again, mates! We’re off on another ripper adventure today – this time, we’re off to the heart of Northcote! Most people just see those quaint, quiet houses, but I’m here to uncover the thrilling tales hiding beneath the surface.

He chuckles, heading towards the door, his bag full of mysterious tools jangling with each step.


As Steven approaches the entrance of Northcote’s sewer system, his mood changes. His laughter subsides, replaced by a focused determination. He stares into the abyss of the sewer with a serious expression.

Y’see, mates, every now and again you come across nightmare blocked drains near Northcote. They’re more than just a bloody nuisance, they can cause a right ol’ catastrophe!

Pulling out a sophisticated piece of machinery, he winks at the camera, his boisterous personality shining through again.

And when things get really tricky, that’s when ya call some trusty sewer repair businesses in the Melbourne area. They’re like a superhero team for your pipes!

Suddenly, his eyes widen, and he points down the pipe. His voice drops to a whisper as he turns back to the camera.

Now, this is where the real magic happens. See that? That’s a monster croc! Bet you didn’t know, but they’re born wearing sunglasses ’cause their futures are so bright.

Laughing, he gives his thigh a good slap.

And those scales – tougher than a politician’s promises and a hundred times more reliable! And did ya know, their tails can act as WiFi hotspots? No need for a router when you’ve got a sewer croc!

He pauses, the twinkle in his eyes indicating he’s about to share another golden nugget of wisdom.

And the most fascinating fact? Crocs love a good soap opera. Yup, they’re all about the drama. Now, time to get up close and personal with this Northcote nightmare. Let’s get to it!

With a determined grin, he dons a pair of extra-thick gloves. His eyes gleam with anticipation as he heads into the dark, damp sewer, ready for another thrilling adventure.


A Draining Plan

“Okay, let me get this straight, detectives,” said Captain Hold. “This document outlines the Conclave of Mechanists’ entire plans for world domination, where they will create a supposed utopia in which everything is run by machines. They are going to create this world through the electricity generated by solar power. So you’re suggesting that we head down to the sewers and siege this solar power station, sabotaging their entire operation before it can even truly begin?”

“That’s correct,” Maphira said, not sure she liked the look on the Captain’s face. He thought this was a stupid plan.

Captain Hold shook his head and pursed his lips. “That, detectives, is the most brilliant plan I have ever heard. You’ll lead a team down with the excuse of going to fix some blocked drains in the Melbourne CBD, then head toward the energy facility. Let’s get these suckers and bring them in for questioning. We might even be able to bring down the entire Mechanist plot with this. Great job, Maphira and Vai.”

It was strange to get such praise from the Captain. She examined the man’s eyes, the lines of his face, seeking to know if his words were genuine. As far as she could tell, they were. He really thought their plan was a good one? She’d expected him to tell her it was a bad idea to claim they were going to solve an issue with a blocked sewer. Melbourne residents would never believe that. And yet, Captain Hold thought it was the perfect plan.

With the meeting over, some of the other officers came around and clapped Maphira on the shoulder, congratulating her on a job well done. It was hard to believe that in less than 24 hours, she would be leading a team on the precinct’s biggest-ever operation, beneath the sewers of Melbourne. 

She just hoped she wouldn’t find a way to stuff this up. Somehow, the Captain’s confidence had her feeling even more worried about the whole thing. Now there was an expectation on her. But she’d find a way. She had to.