Monthly Archives: March 2021

Glass

Punching Balustrades

This is really bad. Really, seriously bad. I totally underestimated the power of Death-Jitsu. It wasn’t supposed to go like this, but I’m in big trouble now. All I wanted was to teach my friends what it was like to be punched all the time because I’m always losing at Punches, a game where we punch each other and the loser has to do some undesirable task. I went and trained under a master of Death-Jitsu, who taught me how to deliver an awesome punch of extreme power.

So what’s the problem? I just used that awesome, super-powered punch on a glass balustrade and accidentally broke it. And this wasn’t just any glass balustrade, but a glass balustrade that has been there for hundreds of years. It’s basically a relic.

Somehow, I don’t think there are any businesses for glass repair near Melbourne that can fix the mess I’ve made. They don’t even make this type of glass any more. My boss is totally going to notice, and then I’m super fired. I just wanted to be good at Punches like everyone else!

Maybe I can find some sort of martial art that helps you magically fix broken glass. If I can master that in a few hours, maybe I’ll be able to fix the stair balustrade, and then my boss won’t be able to tell me off or fire me.

Either way, I’ll have to be more careful with my Death-Jitsu moves. No more destroying random property. I’ll just walk up to my friends, challenge them to a game of Punches, destroy them, and then never use my martial arts moves again.

As for the balustrade, well I doubt I’m going to find a magical solution. I’ll just have to keep my boss away from it until enough time has passed that nobody can blame me for the damage. Yeah, that’s probably my best bet. Well, I’d better get started.

Office

Office Designing Games

I can’t believe my boss has asked me to set up the chairs for our big party today. My friend and I always get stuck with the most boring, most mind-numbing tasks, because the office manager doesn’t trust us with the more exciting stuff. Why can’t we go pick up the cake or set up the decorations? But no, he’s just like “Okay, Michael and Riley, go set up the chairs or you’re fired!” Well, maybe I want to get fired. Maybe I don’t want this lousy job if all I get to do is set up the chairs.

So what, we got a commercial office design company near Melbourne to make our office look nice. Big deal. I could have done that in my sleep. All we needed was a fresh coat of paint on the walls. Alright, I’ll admit that the office does look pretty nice now, but do we really need to throw a party to celebrate? That seems a bit excessive if you ask me.

Obviously, Michael and I haven’t bothered to set up the chairs yet. What’s it going to take? Probably like five minutes. The party isn’t for a few more hours, so we’ve been slacking off by playing old arcade games we found in the company garage. Funnily enough, there’s one where you work to complete commercial office fitouts around Melbourne. I played that for about five minutes before getting bored. But then I found a game called Obliterator of Worlds, so obviously, I had to try that. It was out of order, but I managed to mess with the wires a bit and get it working. Michael is being a total buzzkill, suggesting that we set up the chairs before playing the game, but I’m not buying it. He wants to play this game just as much as I do.

What’s the worst that could happen? A sentient monster comes straight out of the game and tries to destroy our office? Seems unlikely. If Michael wants to get rid of the fun, maybe he should go back to playing Melbourne Office Designers 2.