Would you believe me if I told you there was a great new energy drink on the market today? I know how crazy you people go for a new drink that will give you the energy you need to get through the day, so why not go with the best of the best: Solar Solutions.
It might sound made up, but I can assure you that Solar Solutions is a very real, very good energy drink. My name is Todd Margey, the head spokesperson and marketing specialist for Commercial Solar Solutions. My expertise in this area of business means you can absolutely trust me when it comes to energy drinks. I’m telling you, Solar Solutions is the best. I can’t stop drinking the stuff. I’ve already had ten cans today, available at only $3 each. With $30 you could buy yourself a nice meal out on the town, or you could buy ten cans of Solar Solutions and have all the energy you need to do whatever you want.
Do you want to write a book? Do you want to run a marathon? Anything is possible after drinking Solar Solutions. Disclaimer: not everything is possible. If you want to pick up the moon and bowl it across the solar system, Solar Solutions won’t help you do that.
Addicted to your new favourite energy drink? Just stop by one of our stations for commercial energy monitoring near Melbourne, or any other city for that matter. They’ll run a quick test and recommend how many Solar Solutions you should be drinking (pro tip: it’s almost always more).
Just trust me, you’re going to love this stuff. You’ll be hooked from the first sip. This stuff is so great that we just got a massive order from North Korea. They love Solar Solutions over there. The delivery address is their nuclear weapons program, so their top scientists must go crazy for this stuff.
Okay, so you want to learn the basics of solar energy? You’ve come to the right place. As usual, we make absolutely no promises regarding the accuracy of these statements, so take it as you will. Having said that, our advice is definitely worth listening to as long as you are willing to forgo all legal right to blame us for any harm that comes upon you, including but not limited to broken bones, electrocution, burns, contraction of disease, loss of money and death.
So, you want to know about solar energy. If that’s the case, then we have the commercial solar solutions for you. We don’t sell them, of course, but we can tell you all about them. You see, the key to solar energy is knowing that the solution to every problem is going green and doing your part for the environment. That’s why we would encourage you to either buy a private or commercial solar system or alternatively you could make your own. If you do this, all of your dreams will come true. That’s right, all of them. Because when you do your part for the world, the world rewards you. I know a man who installed a solar system and the next day got his novel published. It was quite extraordinary.
Anyway, so now that you have your solar system, do you need to get commercial energy monitoring for the Melbourne area? The law says no, but we say yes. This is very important because through energy monitoring you can monitor an amount of energy. Makes sense, right? We definitely know what we’re talking about so you should probably blindly follow our advice (again, as long as you forgo all legal rights to the harm you might come across). We are not professional solar people, but we know the basics of all trades and skills.
This has been your crash course on solar energy. We hope you enjoyed it and learned a lot. Come back next week for a post on the basics of electrical wiring!